So, you know that I'll always be upfront about things, and I wanted to share the plan going into Chicago, and the things that I could have done differently.
First, and foremost, I would like to say that it's hard to convey through a blog of words the tone of voice that I'm using. I'm in a great mood, feeling very positive about the future of my training, races to come and fun to be had in Chicago. But now we get into the #reallife below ;)
I feel like that after I got my labs back, and realized that I had stuff going on, I mentally checked out. In marathon training, if you are mentally there, then it's just going to be a crap shoot, and it has been. I have debated so many things like not even going to Chicago TBH or not running the race and going to see a broadway show to feeling stupid that I would even have that thought to feeling stupid that I would even try to run the race with how unprepared I feel. It goes back and forth every day and of course the thoughts of myself also are mingled in with the embarrassing "what would people think if I did this? or that?"
I've also felt a sense of "Why is it always something Katie? GET IT TOGETHER!" lol!
I told Tanner how I felt so stupid going from 80 miles per week at the most I've ever done to somehow ending up flat lining and being completely unprepared, and how dumb that makes me look and immature. And he was like 'Girl, you could have run all 100 mile weeks, and then the night before the marathon said to yourself that you didn't want to run it, and not run it, and THATS YOUR CHOICE. It's all 100% your choices with what you do and if you show up that morning and don't want to run it then you don't." And I was like YES BROTHER PREACH! I call him brother when he's saying these types of things to me, and he thinks that's weird. HA!
The mistakes that I made in this training cycle that I have learned for the future of my running is that I was excited and started too early. I wanted to build a really huge base which I did, but my "base" was my normal peaking mileage amount and I just wasn't used to that, so I got really burnt out. But the truth is that if I want to try for a PR in the future, I would still want to do more higher mileage due to knowing what it is like now, but I just would start out not as many weeks out (this time was 22 weeks).
I've learned myself, and I can't really last well past 16 weeks, so I think that will be the longest that I do a training program in the future. 20 weeks for me is just too much and I'm OVER IT by the end. I also am not someone who is over it, but still does my runs. I just don't go, I skip runs, and then I get to this point and I haven't done a long run in what I believe to be 6-7 weeks? Who knows, but it's a hot mess yall. HAHAH!
So, then it comes to my plan for Chicago. What will happen come race morning? Well, I'm truly very hopeful that I will not feel off or bad, but with the anemia that I have, it goes back and forth on what days feel good, so I'm hoping for a good one. I'm slowly coming out of the woods on that, but I've realized that I do have bad days within it, and so my hope is that it'll be a GREAT morning!
My plan is to not have a plan...at all. I'm going to show up that morning carbed up and just start running. My hope of course is just for a medal, but I refuse to let this be another Boston Marathon saga story. I truly want no drama. I don't want a big story. I want a clean race that I may or may not finish depending on weather and my body. I'm not afraid to pull from this course, and I will if I need to. It's not worth being in a med tent to me, and it's not worth my health right now. I've finished 8 marathons and have nothing to prove here, and of course it would suck to not finish, but I need to go in with this frame of mind. It's not really a "be positive" kind of thing, but more of a "don't be an idiot" thing haha!
As is very obvious, I need a little endurance break. I'm super excited to wrap up this marathon, start lifting again, hiking with Tanner on the weekends instead of long runs or whatever else we feel like doing, and running whenever I feel like it! :)
I also am THRILLED about going to Chicago because I love the windy city and showing Tanner the city and how similar it is to NYC (just cleaner lol). I'm thrilled about seeing friends and making new ones and dinner dates and touristy fun!
Sorry for the lack of running inspiration this morning. My hope is that you're inspired that WE ALL GO THROUGH THIS and if you've felt it, you aren't alone. That's what this beautiful journey of life is all about...the highs, the lows, and the "don't give a dangs" on occasion! ;)